Why It's Great To Be A Man

• Your last name stays put.
• The garage is all yours.
• Wedding plans take care of themselves.
• Chocolate is just another snack.
• You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
• Car mechanics tell you the truth.
• You don't give a rat's behind if someone notices your new haircut.
• The world is your urinal.
• You never have to drive to another gas station because this one's just too icky.
• Same work... more pay.
• Wedding Dress $5000; Tux rental $100.
• People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them.
• The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
• Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So, notice anything different?"
• One mood, ALL the time.
• Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
• Your belly usually hides your big hips.
• One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
• You can "do" your nails with a pocketknife.
• You know stuff about tanks.
• You can open all your own jars.
• You can go to the bathroom without a support group.
• If someone forgets to invite you to something, hecan still be your friend.
• Everything on your face stays its original color.
• Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
• Gray hair and wrinkles only add character.
• If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends.
• You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt