Green Bay Packers
Two boys are playing football in the Park when one is attacked by a rabid Rottweiler. Thinking quickly, the other boy rips off a board of the nearby fence, wedges it down the dog's collar and twists, breaking the dog's neck. A reporter who was strolling by sees the incident and rushes over to interview the boy. "Young Green Bay Packers Fan Saves Friend From Vicious Animal," he starts writing in his notebook.

"But I'm not a Packers fan," the little hero replied.
"Sorry, since we are in Wisconsin, I just assumed you were." said the reporter and starts again.
"Little Minnesota Vikings Fan Rescues Friend From Horrific Attack" he continued writing in his notebook.
"I'm not a Vikings fan either," the boy said.
"I assumed everyone in the Midwest was either for the Packers or Vikings.
What team do you root for?" the reporter asked.
"I'm a Bears fan." the child said.

The reporter starts a new sheet in his notebook and writes,

          "Little Redneck Bastard Kills Beloved Family Pet"