What Did You Say?
A group of young businessmen were chatting at the bar, and one decides to share his recent embarrassment with the others. He tells them he was buying a plane ticket to Pittsburgh, but he was so preoccupied with the beautiful breasts of the girl at the counter, that instead of saying "I'd like a ticket to Pittsburgh", he said,
"I'd like a picket to Titsburg!"! An older guy nearby hears the story and says, "You know, I had a similar experience with my wife this morning. We were sitting at the breakfast table. and I meant to say,

"Darling, could you please pass the butter"... but what came out was...

          "You bitch, you're ruining my fucking life!"